Friday, March 04, 2011

R.O.U.S's

There are two things I've learned about myself this week.

1.  I really am wonder woman, and

2.  I hate rodents more than I hate the giant spiders in Germany.

Aha!  You sense a story coming on, don't you.  Yes, I've been quite absent from my blog for the past couple of days because I have a story...and its, unfortunately, seeming to turn into the neverending story.

Two nights ago, at 2:30 in the morning, I heard a scuffling on the stairs in my house.  Being a "single woman" these days I immediately sat up in bed to figure out what I was hearing...and then I saw it.

In the glow of the bathroom nightlight comfortably sitting in the doorway of my bedroom was a R.O.D.E.N.T.

GrossGrossGrossGrossGrossGrossGrossGrossGrossGrossGrossGrossGrossGrossGrossGrossGrossGross

So, in my 2:30AM intelligence mode I leaped from my bed and grabbed a towel from my laundry basket and chased that furry creature down the stairs.  At least I had the sense to turn on the light for the stairs because by the time I reached the bottom of the stairs I realized that I was actually terrified that a mouse or rat or whatever it was I saw was going to run over my bare toes.

But, the thought of a mouse or a rat (which I will now refer to as the R.O.U.S) coming back UP the stairs if I was to retreat...yeah, that was an even more powerful fear...so I spent the next hour searching for my unwanted houseguest.

And never found it.

Thinking back...what in the world was I going to do with a towel?  I think I figured I could throw it on top of it and trap it...and then what?  I have no idea....I can picture myself at 3AM with a ROUS trapped under a towel and me totally clueless as to my next step.  i. am. brilliant.

Anywho...my beauty rest was definitely over for the night, but I thought I'd better attempt a few more hours of sleep or....repeat after me...  oh wha....taygrummmm...pieyam....

So, because that hussy of an ROUS had already breached the unsaid limit of actually coming up the stairs to the bedrooms I lined the stairs with plastic bags so I could hear it coming if it attempted such a brazen act again...

Of course the night got worse...little Bella must have sensed my unease and was restless and whiney until about 6AM when she insisted on being in my bed where she demanded loudly for cartoons.  And I just gave in because there was no more sleep for our little house.

At 7:30AM exactly I called the housing department....they transferred me to facilities....they transferred me to Pest Control where I spoke with a nice German woman who said the earliest they could get to my house was the next day at 10AM. 

So I went to work...and discovered that the ROUS had entered my house from under my kitchen sink.  It had chewed a large hole in the drywall and around the pipes. 

Now, just a little housing information here...I live in an attached townhouse.  There are four houses connected.  Three of the houses have people living in them...one is empty.  The empty one is next to me and it has had workmen there for about the past 3 weeks...The wall the ROUS had chewed shared the living space of the empty house next to me.  Yes, in not so many words I am blaming the empty house and those workmen for inviting these ROUS's into my life...

Well, now that I knew where it was coming from I promptly duct taped shut my kitchen cupboard doors and rigged a ROUS no trespassing barrier for the stairs out of a baby gate, plastic bags and duct tape.  And then I waited for Mr. Pest Control to show.

So, here's the deal.  I'm just gonna spill my guts here a little...the idea of a ROUS in my house strikes an unreasonable fear in me...and the thought of having to set a trap or dispose of something caught in a trap literally makes my stomach churn.  Thus the second thing I learned about myself.  I really really really do NOT like ROUS's of any kind.

Which is crazy because I actually had a pet mouse that I named oatmeal and I loved him dearly.

Apparently my love for oatmeal does not extend to his untamed wild brothers and sisters.

So, yesterday morning, the pest control guy finally came...told me he was going to set the trap, put it under the sink (where I promptly reducttaped it shut)  and said he'd be back the next day to check and I was not to touch US. Government property in the form of a rat trap.

FINE BY ME...

...except that within 2 hours there was a mouse in it.  So I had to wait 22 more hours for them to come back and get it.

And today he came and got it and then reset the trap....just in case.  And said he'd be back on monday and reminded me not to touch US Government property in the form of a rat trap.

...and within 4 hours we had another mouse in it...which I managed to leave until about 10pm tonight where I decided that leaving a dead rodent for almost 3 whole days under my kitchen sink was asking too much.

So I put on my plastic cleaning gloves and with a sturdy plastic bag release the mouse from the trap and IT WAS STILL ALIVE.

**Should I have put a "not for the squeamish" caveat at the beginning of this?**

Anyhow...I still managed to put it in that bag and took the whole scrabbling little nightmare out to my garbage can that will be picked up Monday morning BEFORE my appt with the Pest Control man.

And then I reset the trap.

W.O.N.D.E.R.  W.O.M.A.N.

Yes, me.  The one who didn't think she would be able to ever 1.  release a ROUS from a trap (dead or alive)  or 2.  dispose of a ROUS in any way shape or form or 3.  not vomit from actually doing steps 1. and 2. OR...and here is the big one...4.  will actually repeat this process because within the time that I disposed of one ROUS and started writing this blog guess what I heard...

SNAP!

That dang trap has got another ROUS in it.

Thats THREE...THREE so far.  I am really not happy about this.

...and so I guess I leave you dangling...on the edge of your seat...desperate to know what the next step will be...with a TO BE CONTINUED...   

4 comments:

TheMuffinMom said...

Bless your heart, what a nightmare! If it makes you feel any better, we get at least a half dozen ROUSes here every year (our house was built in 1805). The locals tell me that for every mouse you see, there are ten more still hidden, lol! And they are smart--I've seen them open lids on *sealed* food canisters. Blech!

Kim E said...

Five. Count em five. At least they were in our garage. And we got them in one night. Well, not we, but Ghon. I didn't even want to go look.

Miss Debbie said...

Invest in your OWN traps, set 2-4 of them under the sink. Then, you can legally just throw the Rous and TRAP into the trash.

Christy said...

Oh my gosh, you ARE Wonder Woman! Lookie you with your mighty ROUS deflector wrist bands! :) In about two months, can I borrow them from you (or better yet, borrow you?) for the gigantic spiders that invade my home every late spring?

I seriously cannot believe you've had to endure ONE, let alone so many, beyond the original horrifically presumptuous ROUS!