Friday, June 27, 2008

Travels have begun

Well, its day 2 of having left Oregon. The departure was sad. I was the big crybaby...packing the house and seeing it all emptied and then watching Mr. C with the kids was just too much for me. Both of the little guys wrote the sweetest little letters to him..."I love you all the way around the world and back," says Chortle and Miss Giggle wanted to make sure and put in a joke about snow in Arizona.

We finished all the cleaning at around 11PM...exhausted we spent the night at my inlaws...slept wonderfully and soundly...up the next day and had the same pile of tears occur a second time.

We spent a few hours with Grandpa in Kennewick and saw A. Linda and U. Fred. It was so good to see them and chat with them. I'll have to write a little later about U. Fred. He recently had part of his leg amputated and I had a chance to just chat a little with him...

We drove through to Ontario and stayed with my A. Nancy that night. Her home is so lovely. She just moved there and has the most beautiful container garden. It made me feel better about container gardening in Arizona.

The next day was a trip to Utah...ending in Orem at my mom's house. Its been a lot of fun to just relax a couple of days.

Regardless of the above photo, I still think both Mr. C and I got some much needed relaxation and sleep over the last couple of days.

Doesn't he just look like he's having a blast here in Utah? We leave today and head south to Zion National Park. I'm just waiting for Mr. C to get back from the "all you can eat meat fest" with the bro-in-laws and my stepdad.

I'm beginning to look forward to Arizona...we'll be there in a few days. Woohoo!

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Two days til packers

Do you know whats going in that box?

I'm so wired right now...what a week this has been. I'm going to be relieved when its over. But...until then...I just walked out in the garage and am in a total loss. Its the cleanest its been in 5 years...just in time for the packers to come and put it all in boxes. Can you believe this?

New strategy - want your garage cleaned and organized? Move. I'm going to keep that one in mind. :)

I've been working like a crazy lady. I have 3 days in office in downtown Portland this week to train my replacement prior to driving out of town next week. He's so great. He has a ton of experience...he's bright...he picks it up quickly. He was expensive, but it is totally worth it.

Today was my day working from home...and because of the insanity from this week...the day to catch up on all my blogs and emails. Gaaaaah! I found 3 McCarney cousin blogs! woohoo! I love finding family blogs...just getting a glimpse into their lives and to be honest...from the pictures I looked at I probably wouldn't recognize 1/2 of my 50+ cousins now. They are all grown up - have facial hair and kids...I still think of them around 8-15 years of age....

So, I'm off to munch some lunch. I had my last Dr.'s appt today for the little one. We heard a good heartbeat...but you can find out more about that here:

Monday, June 16, 2008


Today has suddenly turned into a last minute decision to make it the mediation for the new child care arrangements.

I hate this stuff. I feel angry and out of control and upset. I would be a terrible divorcee - I don't deal very well with this kind of makes me want to beat people up...and I don't even have to be there.

Everyone is put out. Two litle ones have to stay a day longer with grandparents that had other plans....the older one is refusing to help out and whining about everything. I'm stuck at work and can't do much to fix it. Mr. C has to go...

I suppose its better that it just get done and over with. I don't have high hopes that we'll make it through to a decision. We meaning Cruella and Mr. C. She is demanding that the children not leave their "home environment." Meaning...they shouldn't leave the state. AAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHH. Yeah...its better that they stay in a hotel for a week instead of being able to see their daddy's new house and have their favorite toys and play in their daddy's home environment. Does this sound insane to anyone else? Why oh why does she insist on being a ^%#@$^&?

Its days like to day that I seriously have to talk myself down from those thoughts that you never think you can actually have until you meet someone that you dislike as intently as I dislike Cruella at this moment. I won't expound...with my luck she's find this blog and charge me with something insane and get away with it and I'll be in jail or have a massive fine that would seriously put me over the edge and then...

Stopping now while I'm ahead.

Friday, June 13, 2008

Bring me men...

Lamya Lyrics
Empires Lyrics


Mimms that crazy cat thats been missing for 3 weeks magically showed up on our doorstep at 11pm the other night.

She's home! Woohoooo!

Both cats are getting collars and headed home to sissy Sarah's house today! Dave is staying at Sarah's house for the summer and is going to take care of the kitties while she is gone.

I'm so relieved that Mimms showed up. R-E-L-I-E-V-E-D. I thought she was gone forever and now the kitties are all cuddled up and meowing how much they missed each other.

And as a shout out to Dave...if you want a kids party you have to call him. He's the best.

Talk about can see some of his made-for grownups puppet shows on Youtube.

Hoorah! The kitties are reunited!

Thursday, June 12, 2008

Empty House Party

We've decided to hold an empty house party. Actually, its a way to say goodbye to our friends that want to stop by once its all packed up and ready to go.

I thought I'd pull out the chocolate fountain and then its kind of a potluck style. :)

We won't have any furniture in the house and boxes piled high ready for the movers the next morning.

Am I insane?

Does this sound like a party or a headache?

Tuesday, June 10, 2008


If you were around in 1919...just before prohibition started and came across this poster...

I mean seriously...would you quit drinking?

Monday, June 09, 2008


This whole looking back at how I was raised thing that occured when I went through my baby boxes has opened my eyes this weekend to why I sometimes struggle so much with little giggle.

This weekend is a perfect case in point...As many times as she is adorable she is liable to throw a fit. These fits are because she has to help with chores.

Its so foreign to anything I have ever experienced to have a child throw a temper tantrum for having to help. Its not like we're asking her to clean the entire bathroom...just put the towels in the linen closet or while the rest of us weeded for an hour all she had to do was put the pulled weeds in the bucket and you'd have thought that the end of the world had come for her.

And its not like we're sitting around eating bonbons and watching a movie while forcing little Cinderella to work...we give her the "easy" job so we don't have to listen to the complaining as much or as long. She's often done long before anyone else is done with their chores.

This weekend...when given a choice of helping and being part of the "team" or doing her own thing she readily threw down her gardening tools and headed out because, "I don't want to do this so I don't have to."

WOW. I'm trying to remember what would have happened to me when I was kid if I tried to pull that little trick.

I had to take time out this weekend to think about this because it was really making me crazy. I have a general problem with parents letting their kids make up excuses for anything and everything or even worse, telling them its someone else's fault that they didn't succeed...I've never seen the benefit of letting a kid think they are the cat's meow or that the world should cater to them without them actually trying and failing a few times... Why is it so bad to fail? Or lose? Sure it doesn't make you feel great, but its not going to kill you either...puts life into perspective a little bit.

Now, this mindset that "if you don't want to do it you don't have to because you deserve to only have to do what you want" just drives me crazy.

It makes sense....talking about Miss giggle in particular...this is why she has been expelled from her 4th preschool in as many years...if she doesn't want to do it she doesn't. Period. She'd rather throw a fit, throw paint, kick the teacher and punch out other kids than have to sit at the table. And her understanding of why the school won't let her back in..."My teacher is mean to me so we had to go to a school with nicer teachers."

Uh. What? I suppose that at this point I can't blame a 6-year old. She isn't help responsible for her behavior. She is being told that someone else "forced" her to behave that way. So I suppose I blame the parents?, I'm one of the "parents." In Mr. C and my defense I suppose I can say that every other weekend doesn't allow us to exactly make a huge impact on the way this little girl is raised. So what I'd really love to do is point a big huge finger at Cruella and say..."YOU DID THIS."

But then again...Chortle is 8 and was a rock star. He was helpful and didn't complain and worked hard and gets a huge reward for it...a trip to ChuckECheese with his dad to spend some "guy time."

And yours truly gets to stay home with the other one to watch the fit because she doesn't get to, is it really Cruella or is it just LG's personality?

All I know is that its a no win situation...What is a step-parent or non-custodial parent supposed to do? If she lived here full time she would learn quickly that those types of fits get you nowhere but in your room...being helpful gets a reward...being snotty and selfish gets you nowhere....

So maybe I blame the court system? The court system is biased against fathers. I don't just believe that...I KNOW that. People wonder why dad's disappear out of their kids lives...I'll tell you why...ex-wives make life miserable. They do everything in their power to make sure that the time spent with their father is a nothing but drama and headache...aside from the antics they themselves decide to force on you like phone calls and emails and drama galore they breed their children to behave expecially poorly when at their dad's house and tell them they don't have to obey or listen or anything else because he's not "custodial." How does a 6 year old know that word? All I see is a 6-year old mini-me of Cruella being bred and I just stand back and watch...Its not my job, my opportunity or in my ability to make it stop. There is truly NOTHING I can do. (That was a hard lesson for me this weekend.)

And so every other weekend, which is quickly coming to twice a year or so, we have this selfish little thing that doesn't see any reason to be helpful or loving or kind unless its to her benefit. Who kicks and screams and cries because she has to help around the house or make her bed or clear the dinner table. Who tells us that her job is NOT to help, but to watch TV. Thats why they have housecleaner ladies and gardners. I can't believe the life of luxury is expected at age 6...I really can't. and what are we supposed to do? Spend the whole weekend snarling and grumpy? As it is Mr. C only gets 5 days a month with these kids...why does he want to spend it disciplining and trying to teach manners?

So, I suppose at this point I'm throwing up my hands and saying I don't know what to do. There are basic rules of this house that we expect to be obeyed. No hitting or kicking. No lying. No throwing toys or books when angry, etc. Maybe I expect those things and only those thing? Just give up on any of the other stuff and decide to be a "Disney parent?"

This is not a new trial. I 'm sure many full time parents say the same type of things....I'm sure many stepmoms or non-custodial parent's before me have lamented exactly what I'm lamenting. And so it goes....

Thursday, June 05, 2008

Packing memories

Ok...while packing I came across some of the greatest old memory folders...things I hadn't seen in years and just made my heart smile and laugh out loud. I was hoping I could find the letter Emma sent me my first week in college asking if I had any friends that is priceles...instead...from the pile I had in front of me I picked two of my favorites to share here...

First - a paper from a Family Home Evening when i was 6 years old. Jenna would have been 10...Ray was 8...Sarah was 4...Becca was 2. Look how much my family loves me...Also - take special note where my mom says I help out around the house...

Now part two...I'm in highschool and apparently my helpful around the house days were over. Its true what they say, you really learn to appreciate what your parents went through. This letter, however, made me laugh so hard. I sure love you, mom.

I also came across a bunch of poems I'd written for my all-time favorite...

I love my mother very much
Her nice brown hair
Her tender touch
Although sometimes we fight and blame
I love my mother still the same.

By me...age 8ish. :)

Tuesday, June 03, 2008

Blast from the past!

I had a blast from the past today. My dear college roommate that I will love and adore forever left me a little note on baby chucklehead's blog. I couldn't believe it was her!

I loved seeing her face and 3 kids! It just blows me away...I remember her wedding...and her being pregnant with her first so many long years ago...but it just seems like yesterday.

So, I had to just write up a few of my favorite memories as a little tribute to her in memory of all the grand times we had....

The love hut
Catching Mike and Lori making out
sledding in the dead of winter
all the and Bart, Devin and Smell, Dave and Dani, DK and the girl of the week....
off roading in the beast
squeeze those cheeseburgers
watching the intramural flag football team
Fresno vs BYU game
Karaoke at Mike's house (I still have the tape! ha ha ha)
The mouse -- oatmeal
killing heather's plants with bleach and that SALSA!
Bart's personal planetarium
so many good times...I could probably go on for another page or two...

Anyhow...raise a glass to good friends, fun times and great memories!


BYU-Fresno Game


His personal planetarium

Wedding day...