Spiders and weight loss

I love being in my garden. I love green trees and plants and flowers. I love the smell of dirt and the feeling of the wind through my hair and sun on my shoulders.

I even love to pull weeds, rake grass, trim shrubs, and mow the lawn.

What I do not love is spiders...spiders are creepy looking...they move way too fast and if they were big enough you KNOW they'd want to beat us up, wrap us in a web then eat us. Thank goodness they aren't big in Oregon, cuz then I'd never be able to live here again.

So, I'm out in my yard today after about a 2-week haitus from working on a remodel project inside my house and wouldn't you know it but almost the entire yard, garden and flowerbed is covered in spiderwebs...Darn little buggers work so fast! So, off I went looking for a spider stick...(no way I go after those with my hands...even if they are gloved.)

As I was diligently destroying all their hard webmaking work and transplanting them over my neighbor's fence (shhh...don't tell, but I'm convinced is where they all come from in the first place) I decided that instead of cursing them I would use my big brain to think of 5 reasons why spiders are good for weight loss...here is what I came up with...

1. Spiders get my adrenalin going thus increasing my metabolism and the rate at which I'm burning calories.

2. Spiders demonstrate a persistant nature in that they always come back...no matter how many times I move them, ruin their house, stomp on them or spray them...

I should have this same persistance with exercise...no matter how much it pains me, bores me, or I don't want to do it... (you get the idea)

3. The urban legend about the lady with a brown recluse in her bunch of bananas from the grocery store that bit her and killed her has made me diligent in washing, cleaning and examining my food so I only get the best...thus ensuring I'm eating healthy wholesome fruits and veggies.

4. Fear of spiders is called arachnaphobia....thats a pretty good movie and I like that part where he sets the mother spider on fire with the flame thingy...and that has to do with weight loss because they live on a farm and that reminds me that being active like milking cows and stuff will help build muscle and make me stronger and thinner...? ( a bit of a stretch I know...especially since I live in the burbs...)

5. When I looked up the username spiderman on MySpace its a 35 year old male in Boston...which reminds me of the Boston Marathon and that is something that really fit people run...oh and he's a dance teacher and I like to play Dance Dance Revolution and that helps me lose weight.

So there you have it...once again...I'm looking on the bright side of things. :)