Sunday, November 18, 2007

Gobble Gobble

It Thanksgiving week! I really always loved Thanksgiving. As a child I spent it with my mother's side of the family. She is one of 9 children and each of those children have 5+ children of their I have 50+ first cousins on that side of the family.

I LOVED having a big extended family. I'm very close still to my aunts and uncles and my cousins that were around my age. I could call them up or visit them at any time and that is a good feeling to have so many people that love you.

ANYHOW....on Thanksgiving we'd all get together at a highschool in Eastern Oregon (which is where we all lived and where my uncle was the PE teacher/coach...) and all the families would bring food and we would eat and eat and eat... I don't remember a thanksgiving where in my young mind there weren't at least 200 people present (everyone brought friends) or where anyone ever went hungry.

I'm sure my young eyes remember a great deal more food than perhaps was actually there, but recreating in my mind I see 7-8 gigantic 20-pound turkeys, 20 different types of salad, a pile of rolls as tall as me, and least 15 different kinds of pie. I remember my aunt's cement mixer that would make the mashed potatoes. It was a big commercial kitchen mixer but I always thought it was a cement mixer. And piles of stuffing, frogs eye salad, large ladle-filled bowls of as far and as wide as the cafeteria counters would hold.

But my favorite part of Thanksgiving was always the pinatas. Multiple pinatas created for various age-groups of cousins. It was the highlight of the day. They let us hit at the pinata from youngest to oldest within that age group and the strength of the pinata was in direct proportion to how old you were...

The older you got the more like a rock they became.

We would hang the pinata from the basketball hoop, blindfold the "hitter", spin them around until they were dizzy then laugh hysterically watching them try and hit the pinata which one of my uncles would swing wildly and raise up and down. It was near impossible to hit it, but occasionally one of us would get lucky and land a solid hit that would split it apart.

Then came "the sweep." Its a strategic pinata move that all children who do multiple pinatas in their life eventually learn. It consists of a running leap into a knee slide with your feet touching and knees wide open. Your arms are spread wide with your face near the ground as you slide into the pinata candy and essentially sweep the greatest amount of treats into your holding pen.

Thanksgivings are much smaller now...quieter. I think we'll have 12 people at my house this year. But for my stepkids and nephews I'm definitely making a pinata...I'll be teaching this young generation "the sweep" this year.

Sunday, November 11, 2007

The Neverending Story...

Scene: Red-faced with crazy hair and beady red eyes the wicked stepmom advances upon frightened little blond-haired blue eyed angelic face.

Wicked Stepmom (WSM): C'mere you little brat!

(grappling with frightened angel - one hand yanking her hair and the other pummeling her body.)

Enters heroic 16-year old sister.

Heroic sister (HS): I'll save you!

HS pushes WSM, but WSM stops her by throwing out an arm hitting HS in the chest.

HS: You b**ch! Don't you ever touch my sister again!

WSM: You try and stop me.

HS rushes WSM and slaps her across the face.

WSM: Aaaaaaaaahhh (high pitched scream sounding earily like dying witch in Wizard of Oz)

Closing scene: WSM rushing from room chasing HS to beat her into bloody pulp.

We found out about the above lie because Gag had asked to come live with us. "I hate my mother! I want to live with you daddy!"

These types of stories for over 2 years now...

Its all very clear to me...

1. The hatred that Cruella exhibits toward me. Would you be nice to someone you thought behaved like that to your children?

2. Gag has really made a statement this time about her character (or lack thereof)

The funny thing is that Gag doesn't believe she needs to apologize for the big lies she's told because...

I told her she lacked character for saying those horrid lies.

I know...very wrong of me to thing that a 17-in one month girl would be able to handle facing her own lies. Enter Gag..."We're even now...I don't have to apologize. She made me cry for 3 hours!"

Cruella, of course, backed her up and was horrified at my hateful expression toward her daughter.

Problem solved. Gag hates me more than Cruella. The world is now at peace.

S-kid weekends....

wear me out.

tear me down.

exhaust me.

make me crazy.

drive me to drink.

cause heart palpitations.

frustrate me.

How would you know it when you look at these cherubic faces...